You are cordially invited to the celebration of the marriage of… This is often how a wedding invitation begins. I was talking with a couple of twenty-somethings this past week. They are in the time of life in which their friends are getting married and so naturally, they each receive quite a number of invitations. But, because weddings are often really expensive – and because some are still taking covid precautions, sometimes the guest list is limited. So when the invitation comes addressed to just one of them, they look to see if they have a “plus 1.” Can they bring their girlfriend/ boyfriend? Only if they have a “plus 1”.
In Jesus day, there were also rules about wedding invitations. Jesus notices that in the culture of the day, the people who would be invited to wedding feasts and other celebrations – were the powerful, the rich, and those who could “repay the favor.” He also noticed who was missing, who was not at the table – those who were poor – such as servants and slaves as well as those who were crippled, lame, and blind. None of these people could “return the favor.” But this is exactly who Jesus challenges the host to invite – those who do not have a place at the table.
Who doesn’t have at the table today? I would argue that, most of the time, we don’t even see them…
After publishing a children’s book, Jarrett Krosoczka returned to his old elementary school to share his book. As he was setting up his projector in the cafeteria, he looked up and recognized someone immediately. It wasn’t a former teacher or classroom worker. It was… the lunch lady. He greeted her – and she recognized him too. He told her about his books and then, he said, “she started telling me about her grandkids, and that blew my mind. My lunch lady had grandkids, and therefore kids, and therefore left school at the end of the day? I thought she lived in the cafeteria with the serving spoons.” 1
Jarret suddenly saw her as a whole person… and not just someone who served him and the other children chicken nuggets for lunch. Inspired, he created a comic book series about a lunch lady who fights off the bad guys with her kitchen utensils and at the end of the story captures the bad guy with her hairnet and proclaims “Justice is served!” 1
His books were a hit! Not only with children – but also with lunch ladies. Popular culture has not treated lunch ladies very well over the years. And so they were absolutely touched that someone noticed them; and appreciated what they do and even made a superhero who looked like them. After all… what is I that the lunch staff do? They serve. They don’t sit down to eat at the table. Their role is to serve 5 billion school lunches every year.
Who else don’t we “see?”
The activity director of a local nursing home asked if I would do a worship service for the residents once a month. I agreed. And so, a few weeks ago I went there and did a short service – it was a small group but they sang the songs and followed the bulletin and seemed to appreciate it. So when she called me to tell me that the pastor of the church that was scheduled to do the service had covid – and would I help them out, I readily agreed. And then the activity director said – “Is it ok if it is on 2nd floor?” I said I didn’t care what floor I did the service on. I did not realize that “2nd floor” was a code.
When I got to the nursing home, I went to the second floor. There were a couple of people in the TV room – but they were not the people that had come to the worship before. Instead, they were either sleeping or not responsive. But I waited. And as I waited, I started to notice things. There was garbage on the floor. The tables were broken. The furniture was soiled. The carpet squished under my feet. And none of the residents who were there could talk to me. Then the staff person and a few more residents arrived. One woman recited the Lord’s prayer for me. But that was about it.
This seemed to be the group this time, so I started the service. I sang the songs… but no one chimed in.. I read the lesson. No response. So I asked the staff person – communion? He shook his head no.
I have to admit that at the end of the service, I just wanted to run away -it seemed like a complete waste of time. But something stopped me and instead of running away, I thought, “The heck with the Covid rules. I may get in trouble for spreading germs but I’m going to shake the hand of each person and acknowledge them. So I went up to each one and held their hand and blessed them. And to my utter surprise and delight, most of them responded. Some smiled. Others straightened up in their chair. Some looked surprised. The words that I spoke and sang during the service may not have been able to crack through their consciousness – I’ll never know – but a simple handshake did.
I was telling a friend of mine about my frustration with this whole event – but after I told about their response to my handshake, my friend said to me – well then God was at work.
Yes. I was humbled. I just didn’t see it.
The next day I decided to contact the activity director about my experience and I asked her about the change to the 2nd floor. Her response surprised me. She said, “Thank you for coming. The residents voted to have the service on 2nd floor so that those who were cognitively impaired could participate.” Oh. That explains it. They were cognitively impaired. These are people we don’t run into in the grocery store. These are people we ordinarily just don’t see. But now I do.
Now I see them. Just as, after watching the 9 minute video of George Floyd, I can no longer ignore the treatment of black people by the police. I saw it. You saw it. The world saw those 9 minutes in which a black man died under the knee of one who was called to serve and protect. And now we can no longer not-see .
Jesus invites us to open our eyes to see others – especially those “others” that are usually out of sight, out of mind, those people who we do not normally encounter. Notice that Jesus did not just say “welcome” others – because in order to be “welcomed,” the guest has to make the first move – they have to dare to come, to show up uninvited. Instead, Jesus challenges the host in the Gospel and Jesus challenges us to invite those who have not been invited, those who are poor, differently abled, those who are different from us and yet also beloved children of God.
Jesus calls us to reach beyond our circles of comfort not just for the sake of others, but for our sake as well. For it is not just receiving grace that transforms us, true transformation happens when we extend grace with no expectation of anything in return.
This past week we held our Big Band Bash – and it was a ton of fun! The band was great, the food was good - as always - but the best part was that we had a record crowd there – and the reason? People personally invited others to come – friends and neighbors.
Brothers and sisters, siblings in Christ, let us open our eyes to see our neighbors and invite them to sit at the table and join with us in the banquet Jesus has prepared. For you – all – have received an invitation with your name on it – and a Plus. But it isn’t a plus 1. Instead of a 1, there is an infinity sign behind the plus. You plus an infinite number of friends, neighbors and strangers. There is room at Jesus’ banquet for one and all. Thanks be to God. Amen.
August 28, 2022 Pastor Pamela Stalheim Lane
Jarrett Krosoczka, ttps://www.ted.com/talks/jarrett_j_krosoczka_how_a_boy_became_an_artist